Witty, Wacky Wednesday!

You Know You've Been Drinking Way Too Much Coffee When.....

• Juan Valdez named his donkey after you. 
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• You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.
• The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take your pulse.
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• You walk twenty miles on your treadmill before you realize it's not plugged in. 
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• Charles Manson thinks you need to calm down
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• You channel surf faster without a remote. 
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• You name your cats "Cream" and "Sugar."
• You can outlast the Energizer bunny. 
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• You short out motion detectors. 
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• Your nervous twitch registers on the Richter scale.
• You help your dog chase its tail. 
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• You're up to four heart attacks a day.
• Your coffee mug is insured by Lloyd's of London.
• You think CPR stands for "Coffee Provides Resuscitation." 
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• Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.
• You're passing everybody on the freeway when you suddenly realize: you left your car at home!